Tis the Sneezin'

I used to think I was a nice person. I let people with fewer groceries get in front of me in line, I paid for someone else’s coffee, I even helped little old ladies across the street (until I noticed I was older than most of them)! That was before all of the H1N1 hysteria started in earnest.

When every news report began to be filled with statistics and alarming information about how many people could potentially be affected by this pandemic, even I started to get nervous. I distinctly recall having one of those moments where I thought how glad I was not to be going through chemo right now. I remember the warnings and worries associated with low blood counts and thought how frightening this must be for people with compromised immune systems – and how much it could inhibit them from being able to just hang out like a normal person when they felt like it.

I didn't realize how personally affected I'd been by all of the hoopla until I traveled recently. Prior to that event, the only people I came into contact with had been co-workers and the few people I encounter when I go to the store. I'd been dutifully washing my hands and wiping down surfaces for weeks. I was so diligent in this pursuit; I'd even tried to figure out a way to apply my makeup without touching my face. Suffice it to say, not only hadn't I mastered this ability – but any attempts had been dismal failures. I'd end up either looking like a raccoon or circus clown, depending on what part of my face I was trying not to touch.

Purchasing my ticket was no problem – I could do that on line. But actually going to an airport, sitting in a crowded waiting area, and then, horror of horrors, boarding a plane where the air would be re-circulated the entire trip – had my already overactive imagination downright giddy with unhealthy scenarios.

I found myself wishing there was a ticket you could purchase that would allow you to sit on the pilot's lap, safely out of harms way. You have to remember that I'm a child of the '50s, so in my day there were no seatbelts, restraints or child seats. We were carefree critters back then, barreling down the highway smoking cigarettes with abandon, drinking any number of alcoholic beverages – just sort of daring anyone to hit us. Well, I was only four or five at the time, so I wasn't smoking and drinking – but I was definitely along for the ride.

One of my favorite pastimes was to get on dad's lap and "drive." Sometimes he would actually take his hands off the steering wheel, so I was absolutely certain I was in control. This wasn’t something I could pursue for long periods of time because the space between dad and the steering wheel was so shallow; I nearly had to suck all of the air out of my body in order to fit. But for a few moments in nearly every trip we took, I got to live the dream of driving a car.

Today it's not uncommon to hear about kids that age simply getting behind the wheel and taking off. Some television news magazine shares the story nationwide and we get to hear the precocious little darling in his or her squeaky little voice recount what they were thinking when they got behind the wheel.

In my day, if you had ever been able to sit down again after your spanking, you would have had to do it in your bedroom because you were grounded for life!

Which brings me back to my previous comment about sitting on the pilot's lap. I realize now this was not a good idea for a number of reasons. I'll stick with just two: (a) I'm a bit long in the tooth to be sitting on anyone's lap and (b) recent news stories have led me to believe this may actually not be the safest perch on a plane. It would seem that some pilots are too busy either sleeping, texting or playing video games to actually present a safe haven. Who knew?

So there I was, forced to mingle with the masses, most of whom I feared were contagious and had no business traveling. I was committed to this trip because awaiting me at the other end was my son, his wife, my granddaughter – and my brand new grandson. If hell and high water couldn't keep me away – what was a little swine flu?

Remarkably, I didn't even hear anyone sniffling as we awaited our departure. I have to admit, I was much more aware than usual of the people around me and hoped that the woman who asked me to hold her baby while she took off her shoes wasn't offended when I used a disinfectant wipe before and after accepting this duty. I thought seriously about wiping the baby down as well, but that would really have been pushing it.

I began to ponder just how resilient we humans are. Heck, if you've gone through chemo, a little H1N1 might seem like a walk in the park by comparison! We are, after all, social creatures – and it's the holiday season. We're going to travel, we're going to hug and kiss and maybe even cry. It's for sure, bodily fluids will be flowing. Of course, we should be sensible – and also feel compassion for those who have been affected by this pandemic. But we should also remember what cancer has taught us: If we allow it, fear has a way of minimalizing our lives and causing us to miss out on the miracles all around us.